Getting Personal with Concierge Rabbis
by Julie Kemp Pick • September 17, 2017 • Daily North Shore

HIGHLAND PARK – With Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur approaching, many families are choosing non-traditional ways to observe the High Holidays.
Less than one-third of American Jews say they belong to a synagogue, according to a Pew Survey of U.S. Jews as reported in the Baltimore Jewish Times. Many rabbis have chosen to leave brick and mortar buildings to provide more personalized, concierge services in people’s homes.
DailyNorthShore spoke with two concierge rabbis on the North Shore: Rabbi Debra Nessleson from Amichai, and Rabbi Ari Moffic from Cohere.
Nesselson has been a concierge rabbi since 2011 when Amichai, which means “my people live,” was founded. Prior to that, she was a rabbi at B’nai Torah in Highland Park for 10 years.
“The advantage of being a concierge rabbi after being a conventional congregational rabbi for 10 years is that I could spend so much time with each family and cultivate and nurture long-lasting relationships that have depth,” said Nesselson.
Why has there been a decline in synagogue memberships?
“I think there’s been a shift in our society, our social lives, the age of the Internet,” said Nesselson. “We can access connections even by becoming part of a chat room. We can livestream religious services and we never have to leave our homes. This is not just a Jewish phenomenon, it’s a religious phenomenon in the United States.”
Both Nesselson and Moffic emphasized that they are not anti-synagogue. Nesselson said, “I love synagogues and I go to synagogues. This is just a different model to address a very specific need.”
Moffic added, “I love synagogue and congregational life as well as wanting to grow the pie. It’s not either or. I hope I’m helping to strengthen our community as a whole by supporting people who haven’t been in our pie, not by taking away pieces of the pie.”
Nesselson explained that Amichai decided there was a need in the community to address this group of people for whom synagogue membership no longer seemed to have as much resonance as it once may have.
Nesselson said parents still want their children to be educated as Jews, so Amichai schedules classes for students and their teachers to meet at convenient times rather than after a long day of secular school.
Nesselson said the Bar and Bat Mitzvah program is the fastest area of growth at Amichai, but she wouldn’t recommend this approach to children who didn’t attend secular school with other Jewish children. “On the North Shore there are many Jews, so our kids derive a sense of community whether they’re actively seeking it or not,” she added.
Nesselson said the time she spends with congregants in life cycle events has the quality that a concierge relationship would allow, but she doesn’t charge a fee for that.
There will be a fee for High Holiday services that will be held for the fifth year, and Amichai also charges a fee for other services in place of membership dues.
Nesselson will lead the High Holiday services beginning Thursday, September 21, 10 a.m. at the Highland Park Country Club, which are open to the public. “We have a number of world-renown musicians and they’re beautiful services,” she said.
Less than one-third of American Jews say they belong to a synagogue, according to a Pew Survey of U.S. Jews as reported in the Baltimore Jewish Times. Many rabbis have chosen to leave brick and mortar buildings to provide more personalized, concierge services in people’s homes.
DailyNorthShore spoke with two concierge rabbis on the North Shore: Rabbi Debra Nessleson from Amichai, and Rabbi Ari Moffic from Cohere.
Nesselson has been a concierge rabbi since 2011 when Amichai, which means “my people live,” was founded. Prior to that, she was a rabbi at B’nai Torah in Highland Park for 10 years.
“The advantage of being a concierge rabbi after being a conventional congregational rabbi for 10 years is that I could spend so much time with each family and cultivate and nurture long-lasting relationships that have depth,” said Nesselson.
Why has there been a decline in synagogue memberships?
“I think there’s been a shift in our society, our social lives, the age of the Internet,” said Nesselson. “We can access connections even by becoming part of a chat room. We can livestream religious services and we never have to leave our homes. This is not just a Jewish phenomenon, it’s a religious phenomenon in the United States.”
Both Nesselson and Moffic emphasized that they are not anti-synagogue. Nesselson said, “I love synagogues and I go to synagogues. This is just a different model to address a very specific need.”
Moffic added, “I love synagogue and congregational life as well as wanting to grow the pie. It’s not either or. I hope I’m helping to strengthen our community as a whole by supporting people who haven’t been in our pie, not by taking away pieces of the pie.”
Nesselson explained that Amichai decided there was a need in the community to address this group of people for whom synagogue membership no longer seemed to have as much resonance as it once may have.
Nesselson said parents still want their children to be educated as Jews, so Amichai schedules classes for students and their teachers to meet at convenient times rather than after a long day of secular school.
Nesselson said the Bar and Bat Mitzvah program is the fastest area of growth at Amichai, but she wouldn’t recommend this approach to children who didn’t attend secular school with other Jewish children. “On the North Shore there are many Jews, so our kids derive a sense of community whether they’re actively seeking it or not,” she added.
Nesselson said the time she spends with congregants in life cycle events has the quality that a concierge relationship would allow, but she doesn’t charge a fee for that.
There will be a fee for High Holiday services that will be held for the fifth year, and Amichai also charges a fee for other services in place of membership dues.
Nesselson will lead the High Holiday services beginning Thursday, September 21, 10 a.m. at the Highland Park Country Club, which are open to the public. “We have a number of world-renown musicians and they’re beautiful services,” she said.